Has online dating killed romance?

computer heartsA lot of people are under the impression that online dating isn’t romantic.  The strategy and deliberation used throughout the process ruin any opportunity for spontaneity and kismet.

I disagree. I think online dating has allowed romance to keep blossoming.

It used to be romantic for a man to run after a woman and say, “Hey, I can’t take my eyes off you, let’s go out”.  Nowadays, that same poor schlep would get slapped with a restraining order.

There’s nothing romantic about being accosted at the grocery store.

Online dating isn’t killing romance. Our increasingly large and, ironically, alienated society is. Our world is not ensconced in long-standing communities surrounded by friends and neighbors we’ve known our entire lives.

We’re transient. The safety of familiarity, fleeting. We flip homes. W rent apartments. We move frequently. We change jobs regularly.

I don’t deny that online dating has its challenges. It can be brutally shallow.

When you see thousands of hot singles, it’s not enough to think,  “I want to meet someone great”. Instead you begin to think, ”I want to meet someone great and great looking. With so much choice, I’m bound to get lucky.”

But, would that be any different in real life? If you put thousands of singles in a room, wouldn’t everyone judge on looks initially given the perception of countless choices?

Again, this isn’t merely an online dating phenomenon.

3 reasons why online dating is romantic.

1) The process of getting ready for online dating – if done right – can be as exciting as getting ready for a date – because, essentially, that’s what you’re doing. Figuring out what clothes to wear. Doing your hair (men too!). Getting great shots taken and deciding what to post can produce anxiety but also excitement – just like dating.

2) Putting together your About Me section can be truly empowering when approached with the right attitude. This is the perfect opportunity to take stock of all your amazing attributes and fun conversation starters.

When you make the effort to think back at your best anecdotes and put together your own unique twists on your interest, it can be such a confidence-building experience.

I’ve had so many clients be amazed at how much more interesting they’ve discovered themselves to be.

Have you ever taken the time to write your resume and then, by the end of it, discover that you have more to offer than you realized? That same uplifting feeling can happen with a well-conceived About Me.

3) The moment you go online, you’re suddenly in an environment filled with so much more potential and hope than you’d ever get walking down the street or into a bar.

The main reason why online dating is romantic.

Online dating is the online equivalent of spotting someone from across a crowded room. It’s as simple as that.

When you go online, you’re greeted by thousands of profiles. When someone explores yours and decides that – of all the people online, you’re one of the most intriguing – then that’s pretty romantic.

The same holds true if you’re the one making first contact. After all, your interest means that person had a little something extra that caught your attention – and kept it.

And yes, I know some men and women put feelers out to everyone.

But I also know, from my own experience and the experience of countless others, that this is the exception, not the rule.

Online dating gives single both hope and opportunity in a day and age when these are becoming more limited. So approach it with the same effort and attitude that you would any other venue where you might meet the love of your life.

For extra help with your presentation (and to outshine your competition!), have a look at my services.

These include everything from phone consultations to writing your profile from scratch using your words and anecdotes so that it’s completely true to you.

Start here with my online personality questionnaire and then send your answers to me.


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