Today I critique the excerpt of a dating profile that I found on okCupid. Though I read some outrageous ones on that site (what is it about free dating sites!), I’ve chosen one for the simple fact that it’s actually not notable at all:
Excerpt from the dating profile of a 43-year old man:
Hi. I am a self-employed consultant working in IT. I love what I do. I’m here to meet a new friend and socialize. Maybe you’re an entrepreneur too? Then let’s have some creative and intelligent discussions, shall we!
My Critique
There’s nothing remarkable about this man’s dating profile. Though this is an excerpt, it nevertheless captures the approach he used throughout.
For one, his dating profile was far too focused on his work. It’s great to love what you do. However, if you’re going to mention it, then make it sound interesting. Say why you love it or give an anecdote about something funny or unusual that happens in your day, or maybe some fascinating fact about your field.
In addition to being too focused on work, there was far too much reserve in his dating profile. It seemed written from the head and not from the heart. I don’t suggest getting sentimental, but do display emotion like happiness or a passion for an activity. In other words, show life. You’re not at a job interview.You’re at the virtual equivalent of a singles party.
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